Wednesday, August 23, 2006

If on a winter's night of 1,000 stars...

The night before
Ah good. Basically come to Basingstoke, we'll have a top laugh. Only 45 mins from xxx, xxx and xxx, plus it'll be fun trying somewhere new and we can be back home in good time. Curry, couple of ciders and some chat.

The night
Why? Because I'm only 15 mins away that's why!

Wow! So my train has a jacuzzi — although the personal flunky is a bit lackadaisical frankly. A pox on both your houses, lots of love uncle bunkle. x

"Technical expertise will never overcome the fundamental animality of human existence." Discuss. Plus top curry chaps lots of love from downtown 'stoke, x.

This train calls at xxx, xxx and Basingstoke. Which is nice. Well done for doing a Reepacheap. Lol HRH Limpy.

My train has a personalised griffin groomer. Apparently he's fresh out of l'academie du grooming von das griffon. And it smells of wee.

My train has a personalised wee groomer. But he's fresh out of griffins, alas alack.

I am now arriving at xxx. xxx the next station stop. But in my heart I'll always be in Orvieto, mashing up pigeons with Gladys.

My name is Herbert. I live on the second floor. I live upstairs from you. Think you must have seen me before. Fancy a muffin? Lol Herbert x

Fancy a muffin? It won't cost you nuffin. Cos Bob has a job that'll pay for us all. He'll pay for our grieving, he'll pay for our thieving, cos he knows the joys of a Basingstoke mall.

Rubbish. Did anyone else fall asleep on their train and have to be woken by a pretty girl with dribble rolling down their chin?

Yes, except it was my chin and my dribble. Where is Ptolemy? Eh?

Incidentally I want to make it perfectly clear, I am prepared to pay for your muffins but I'm afraid I can't pay for your grieving. I draw the line there.

Ah shit yes sorry I fell asleep in cosmic fairyland. I regain wakinginging in a turd's arse opposite a cowboy child and a woman. I just went through a place called Bramley. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES if you see what I mean there yaha. Fucking good work on the limerick front by the way there Bennington, and also on demonic curry action. Pologies on the post curry banter-missing nap, see you soon, have less sex for goodness sake and now, where's my bicycle?

Hi fellas I'm back home in bed. Did I win the back home in bed race?

No because I too am back home in bed, but I have a naked Rocky bar beside me. Beat that bitch. G'might 4eva. Princess Constantwine the sixth.

The morning after
Hi chaps
Great to see you last night. Anyone else feeling particularly windy after that cuzza?
Top japes anyway

I was quite drunk I think and cycled through xxx last night like a bat out of hell, a ginger bat, late for an important meeting with all the other hell-bats and fuelled by a top curry.
Excellent skills on the basingstoke front, who'd've thought it. Something slightly spooky about the whole place though, I mean it was just us and that Saga tour in the whole town, ostensibly.
twinkle-arse, the my little pony


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